As I sit down to update on the goings on of the week so far and having every intention of doing so, I'm struck with this weight on my heart. . .with this sense of not belonging anywhere. After a not so productive/positive time in my Russian class (feeling a little confused as to whether or not I came out/should be out here to spend a part of my time each day in study and frustrated,, because of the time spent on language, with feelings of not being as productive/having this tangible object that I can see/touch as a result of my time out here) and being in the middle of this whole job hunt thing for Matt, I'm feeling that I don't belong anywhere. Granted, this is what I desired for my life. . .I want to not have things that hold me down to a particular location/way of thought just because that is the way it's supposed to be done. I'm wrestling with the effects of that idea of thought, though, and am questioning myself and wondering if that is an essentially good concept or were my desires flawed. Comments/thoughts anyone? Give it to me straight and honest. I can take it. I'm a tough girl.
-Makinzie
P.S. Here's an item of news (I'm looking over my shoulder to make sure Matt's not around; we all know how he doesn't appreciate the gross things in life, which I, on the other hand, find quite amusing). I very proud of myself after, what I hope, is a successful diagnosis my last ailment. . .ringworm. I managed to escape several outbreaks of it at school this past year but come all the way out to Russia to get this nasty little circle rash thing on my forearm. Luckily, I had been personal witness to the fungus (isn't that so gross? as I'm laughing to myself) so I new what the first signs of it were. I was able to go to the Apteka (pharmacy) and, in my limited Russian, successfully find an antifungal cream. Sorry if that was too much information for y'all. Let's hope I was correct in my diagnosis and am not harming my body with this mysterious Russian cream. I miss you guys.
8 comments:
Kinzie, I know where you belong(sorry, it's gonna b cheesy): you belong to God & you belong in my family & yours too! I know that's not exactly what you were going for, but it's all I got. - he, he
Love yall lots, miss you still.
-your sis-in-law
& also, don't forget: DO your best & let God do the rest! when you think you can't learn another noun in Russian, keep trying & God will back up your efforts. o yeah, & I've had ringworm b 4 too, not very fun.
It might be that you are in the middle of the classic missionary quandary: Philippians 2:25-30. Maybe you went to Russia to get ringworm? Seriously, there's nothing like having lots of physical needs/challenges to force a missionary to rely on and bond with the people she lives among. . . which isn't to say that you should talk to your conversation class about your ailments. Still, wouldn't it be interesting to learn more about Russian healthcare? With prayers, Liam
first, i have really appreciated the length and detail of your blog. kinzie, i love it that you have ringworm. i am glad you shared that with us. it makes me feel like I am connecting with your spirit.
First of all I just wanted to say hi and that I love you and miss you guys. I am praying for you and want to remind you like I know you have heard many times before that you are in Russia at that specific place for a great reason and God will do great things through you both. I know both of you well and I know you have hearts. You have a place Kinzie and with His help you will find it. Even as I write these words I remind myself of these things which I have been struggling with lately also. I love you guys and I can't wait for more stories about what you are doing.
Kinzie,
I think feeling displaced is very normal, especially when you're in a foreign country and an entirely new situation. I think that as you cling to the Lord and HIS will for your life both short-term (daily) and long-term, that HE will give you the direction you're longing for. ps--The ringworm tid-bit was hilarious. We love you guys and miss you. Talk to ya later,
Dianne
Culture shock...it's normal. Don't sweat it, Kenzie. Your such a beautiful and lovely person. You are doing just fine.
-Dan, Atarah and Chris
PS boy do we miss talking to you two.
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